That great love of mine

I've been reading my horoscope like a maniac these past few days. Not so much what's going on right now. But rather about my sign. I've found it most amuzing to find so much truth in them. So with "Requiem for a dream" blazing in my headphones I Read the following:

"You are now living in a civilized world. And yet, your fantasms take their roots in an archaic universe, an intact and forgotten universe, a universe where human beings are still connected to nature, in which people live according to the rhythm of the seasons, where one is near to wild beasts and the huge forest of the origins. The man of your dreams is a primeval being, a being who hardly emerges from animality, a being who lives in harmony with the world, plants, trees, beasts, and the forces of the earth. This primitive, powerful and sensual being knows all the secrets of amorous ecstasy. He can show himself brutal without meaning it. But there's in him neither violence nor wickedness.

The man of your dreams comes out from the woods. He emerges from an old and wise world, from a land of plenty, from a lost paradise. He resembles a wild beast - of course he's human, but is still somewhat an animal, he's the brother of King Kong, with his primitive savagery and his awkward tenderness. He's a peasant, a woodcutter, a forest guard, or a poacher. Also a gardener, who knows the herbs that cure and those the perfume of which enchant the senses; or a vine-grower who amorously touches his grapes and takes care of his big wooden barrels with patience and relish. He resembles Pan, Bacchus or Dionysos, those ancient orgiastic and all-powerful gods. His wild sensuality knows of no limits; nevertheless, at the same time, he's all innocence. This man of extravagance can handle you roughly but without meaning it. And when he realizes that he can hurt you, he will become all tenderness and protection."

Imagine my surprise when I see my own words being spelled out for me in a matter such as this. I laughed, I ran my nails into my neck. Hard. I thought about HIM and I thought... 'You are my destiny. My one downfall.' He will be the end of me, because he was where my life started. It happend so suddenly and I'll never forgive myself for falling. But I did. And I still do. And that has become a great issue for my already existing inner turmoil.
I need to see this thing to the end. What may, for all intents and purposes, be the very end of me.

Bear with me.